Parents, Go to Church. NOT!

 I'm not writing as much on my blog the past few years, as I am teaching a number of Bible studies weekly, which keeps me busy and takes away from my writing time, but a local pastor just posted the following (credit is given to the author) and I just have to respond, because the premise of the article is so skewed to what should be, that I couldn't just not say anything. I am going to put my comments, as you read through the article, in italics.

Parents, Just Go to Church

SEPTEMBER 23, 2022 CAMERON COLE

At a Fortune 500 corporation, many interests and demands consume the company’s time and resources. How does an executive choose what opportunities to prioritize? The same is true for Christian parents. Tremendous resources exist for discipling kids: devotionals, catechisms, and guides for family worship. Parents are paralyzed when confronted with all the good options. Where do we start?

Why should parents be paralyzed? Where do you start? Seriously? EVERY Christian should know that there are certain things that a Christian should be doing for their own walk with the Lord, and they should, by Scriptural mandate, be doing these things WITH their children as well. It doesn't require “resources” other than what you should have at hand. Prayer does not need anything other than just talking to the Lord. You don't need written prayers or a prayer book. God doesn't want recitations, He wants you to talk to Him personally. Do it for yourself, do it with your children, and teach them to do it for themselves.

Get a Bible. Preferably the KJV is the most accurate word for word translation. Most of the others, while more modern in language, are really nothing more than paraphrases of what are the minority manuscripts, which have major issues in the original manuscripts. (I have an article on that in my blog archives.) Reading and studying the Scripture is a must, as well as prayer. How can you know God if you don't read what He wrote to tell you about Himself? How can you grow in knowledge and grace? We need to know God's Word, and by that I don't mean racing through it to read (or more accurately skim) it in a year. Take as long as it requires to go through it carefully verse by verse, chapter by chapter, book by book, meditating on what it says, looking up background info on the circumstances and history of the passage or book you are reading, and learn about God through that. Most everyone has a computer and historical, archaeological, geographical, etc. info can be looked up online with a simple search. Don't worry that you “can't understand everything at the beginning.” Just start doing it. God promised that the Holy Spirit would teach us and He is the best teacher you can have. It might take time, but the more you do it, the more you will find it easier to understand. Do it for yourself alone, and do it with your children, teaching them to do the same.

Praise and worship can be accomplished through the two previous disciplines, as well as singing praises unto the Lord. Get some hymnals. Get some CD's. Sing the songs when alone, teach them to and sing them with your children in family worship. Do all these things daily as much as possible.

None of these disciplines require a plethora of resources. What they do require is your time and commitment. And that seems to be the problem with most people. What ARE your priorities? To turn them over to someone else? The church? The church has been failing for years as people are walking away in droves. Do not trust your children's salvation to the church. God gave them to YOU. YOU and you alone are the one who will stand before God as responsible for what that child was taught. The church corporation will not stand before God and be held responsible for them. YOU will.

Hear me when I say this: start by going to church. Yes, I encourage you to pray with your kids. Read the Bible as a family. Attempt to have family worship. Use a catechism. These are all excellent disciplines. But if you can only choose one discipline, go to church. Make attending corporate top priority for your family. There’s nothing more positive you can do for your children than to attend corporate worship at your church every week.

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. This is not the top priority and discipline. To think that you can toss aside the very mandate that God gave parents (Therefore shall ye lay up these my words in your heart and in your soul...... And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. Deut. 11:18a,19) is foolishness. WE are the ones responsible for bringing up our children in the Lord, NOT the corporate church. God has nowhere dictated that we have to attend a weekly service in a church building. Nowhere in the Bible will you find that mandate. To set aside the Sabbath as holy (which the Sabbath is Saturday, by the way, not Sunday), yes, that is a commandment (the commandments show us our sin) that the church has been ignoring for almost 2,000 years, as it substituted a day, chosen by man, to live more agreeably with the laws of the Emperor Constantine when he outlawed Sabbath worship. The Bible says to keep it holy, not run to a bunch of services on a day that was not mandated by God to fulfill an obligation. To substitute services that may or may not be totally apostate in nature, as a replacement for raising our children in the admonition of the Lord is not going to do anything for anyone.

To not forsake the interactions of other Christians whether in fellowship or worship is given as an instruction in Hebrews, but fellowship and worship are not solely defined by being in a designated church building on a Sunday morning. They are, these days with the great apostasy going on, more often found in truth and spirit in private settings of Bible studies or house churches and definitely should be daily ongoing in the household of a Christian. If going to church weekly is your ONLY religious action in your life and toward your children, I can pretty much guarantee that your children will walk away from the Lord. Not to mention that your own spiritual life will not be in very good shape.

Corporate Worship Sets the Tone for Life

A parent in our church once made a statement that caught me off guard: “Corporate worship is crucial to my family. It’s the center of our family’s life.” I know this family. They do family worship as well, and they read devotions, but this father said corporate worship is the single biggest priority in his family’s life. Why?

Yes, I must ask why also. Should not setting an example of godly Christian living during the rest of the week be the first priority? Children DO learn by example, and if you are living like a devil six days and 23 hours of the week, but make it a priority to go to church on Sunday morning for an hour, what exactly ARE you teaching the children? Hypocrisy? If church is merely an addition to a daily lifestyle of teaching the children the disciplines of a Christian faith, then it adds to and complements the example, but it should not be the ONLY example and only priority.

This dad’s mentality is consistent with how Scripture prioritizes corporate worship. God is the center of our lives. In corporate worship, we make this clear. We receive God’s grace through Word, sacrament, and prayer. We respond to God’s grace with praise, thanksgiving, and love. We fellowship with him under his Word and by his grace. We serve, worship, and flourish out of that communion. In these ways, corporate worship is the whole Christian life in distilled and concentrated form.

I must be reading different Scriptures, because in my Bible, it is our personal relationship that is the priority. Without that, the rest, the corporate gatherings are no more than show for public display. The early churches had major issues with sin, false teachers, and heresies. The apostles were constantly warning and chastising the church, which was failing in many aspects, and was addressing that every individual in that church needed to get on the right track. The church boils down to the individuals in it. As a corporation, it is as much a failure as Israel as a nation was. The Church (as opposed to the church) is comprised not of corporate bodies but of individuals in and outside of those bodies who are walking with the Lord. Read the letters to the seven churches in Revelation. Be an overcomer in the midst of the apostate church. Don't look to it to save your children.

God commands his people to meet for worship weekly (Deut. 5:12; Heb. 10:25). It’s not optional or a matter of preference, and this is God’s mercy toward us. God knows how badly we need the benefits of meeting together. God doesn’t need our worship. We, on the other hand, desperately need corporate worship to center and order our lives around the Lord.

The content of those two verses were already addressed. Keeping the Sabbath holy means that you don't work or do things that are not God oriented on Saturday (if you want to be accurate). Family time is considered a part of that, as you are to teach your children at all times. Rest is a part of that, as the whole idea was to have a rest from working for physical and mentals health's sake as well as your spiritual sake. The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. Meeting with others to fellowship and worship is beneficial when done in keeping with God's standards, but it does not have to be on a Sunday (although as long as you are keeping the Sabbath as well, instead of replacing the Sabbath, there is nothing wrong with it) nor does it require being in a building designated as a church. Where two or more are gathered together, Christ is in the midst of them.

As for Hebrews, the book of Hebrews was written as a response to the straying into Gnosticism. Many of the people were beginning to go out to the desert to become hermits (maybe thinking they were emulating John the Baptist?) and separating themselves from the rest of the flock. They were told to “not forsake the assembling of themselves together as was the manner of some.” Yes, those who were totally cutting themselves off from the Christian community altogether to live as hermits needed to stop doing it and and go back to gathering with others of the faith in whatever manner that was available. It doesn't mention going to a service at a designated building on a Sunday as a mandate. Do not add to God's Word what He has not said. Bible studies, social fellowship times, and etc., all qualify as not forsaking getting together with other Christians. This is taking a verse totally out of context of what was intended to the original audience to create a man-made legalistic mandate. Gathering with like-minded Christians is good and essential for us, but God never delineated what that gathering constituted. Historically it has been a church building for a very long time, but it is not the only way.

It’s Hard to Get to Church. That’s the Point.

Nothing can prepare you for the labor that is getting small children out the door to church on a Sunday morning. I don’t know if it’s spiritual warfare or whiplash from the weekend, but dressing small kids and loading them into the car is a grind. Even when your kids are teenagers, there are days they seem to resist just about anything you suggest. Getting to church is hard. But that’s part of the value of attending church every Sunday. It sets the tone for the Christian’s daily struggle to live in personal relationship with Christ.

Daily fellowship with and service to the Lord involve a purposeful, deliberate approach. Getting up in the morning to pray and read Scripture isn’t easy. Praising God in times of pain and sorrow can be a struggle. Entering conflict, repenting, and engaging in reconciliation requires effort, purpose, and patience. But however difficult these endeavors are, we find life and peace as a result. The intentional effort we make to attend corporate worship each week reinforces for our kids the patterns of intentionality and endurance necessary for a fulfilling and fruitful Christian life.

Yes, daily fellowship and service to the Lord does involve a purposeful deliberate approach. Which most people are too lazy to do, because that is exactly what is needed to bring your children up in the Lord. Those who make a priority of going through the hassle of getting the children dressed and ready for church to make the obligatory appearance (is it any worse than getting them ready for school which is generally even earlier than church?) feel vindicated of their responsibility to give their children a Christian education at home themeselves, but it does not vindicate them of that responsibility. Spending time every day, as the Scripture says, when going here, going there, doing this, doing that) is much harder than taking them to (or dropping them off at) church on Sunday. If that is the best a Christian parent can do, then shame on them. These are eternal lives with which God has entrusted you.

Model Unflinching Commitment to Sunday Worship

When I was a kid, we went to church every single week, even on vacation. I often complained about it (though I liked the donuts they served at Sunday school). I asked my father, “Why can’t we take a week off?” My old-school Dad would always reply in the same gruff Southern drawl, “Son, God gives us seven days a week. We can sacrifice one morning for him.” The only other “religious thing” we did in our household was pray at meals. Still, my Dad’s maxim and our consistent church attendance made a major impression.

So the ONLY things of a religious nature that this person experienced growing up was making it a priority to go to church on Sunday (as if that is what saves you) and saying grace at the meals. How much did he actually learn at church in the way of knowledge of God is my question. Most children I know who have attended church only know a few Bible stories, and even those they don't usually have accurate. Several adults (one in her 80's) who had attended church ALL THEIR LIFE, were surprised when they learned that the David who slew Goliath was also the King David of Israel. They had no idea he was the same person. How do you go to church all your life, and not know this simple fact? What were they teaching there? But the people were sure they were saved, merely by attending church regularly on Sunday. Church attendance is not a panacea for our sins. It is not a replacement for an ongoing relationship with the Lord.

When I left for college, this pattern was deeply embedded in my life. I was usually the only person on my hall who attended church on Sunday, but I’d get up and go. When I traveled and missed Sunday morning church, I’d go to a campus service that night.

So what was ingrained in this person's mind? A deep love for God and a desire to study His Word and worship Him in prayer and praise. No. It was a pattern. A ritual that was embedded in his life. One that he apparently feels will ensure that he makes it to heaven? Oh, that it were that easy.

My family’s commitment to Sunday worship communicated major truths to me: God is the center of life. God is worthy of praise and worship. The Christian life requires sacrifice and discipline. My father rarely talked to me about spiritual matters; I don’t think he had a vast vocabulary for such conversations. Still, he modeled the Christian life well, largely through his unflinching commitment to go to church every Sunday.

Does attending church ritually really communicate the idea that God is the center of life, or does it communicate that the ritual is essential to make sure you are good with God? Which is it really? How can God be the center of your life if He is only invited in one hour a week? He admits that even talking about spiritual matters was non-existent in his childhood. How do you learn if it is not taught? And is ritualistically attending a weekly service an actual model for Christian life? The Muslims do it unflinchingly committed, the Orthodox Jews do it unflinchingly committed, the Mormons do it unflinchingly committed, the Catholics do it unflinchingly committed and many Protestants do it unflinchingly committed. And how many of them are actually saved? Commitment to a ritual does not translate into a relationship with God.

If you feel inadequate to lead your kids spiritually, just go to church. If strategizing about your Christian parenting feels overly complicated, just go to church. If you’ve been taking a few too many Sundays off, just go to church. If all of this seems overwhelmingly difficult, ask God to give you the grace to have this consistent discipline in your family’s life. Faithful church attendance can have an eternal influence on your kids.

If you feel inadequate to lead your kids spiritually, the for heaven's sake, get into your Bible and get on your knees, because if you have been a Christian for any length of time, SHAME ON YOU!!! There is no excuse. Do not count on the church to teach you God's Word. God said “Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” You need to ask for the Holy Spirit to help you learn and diligently be studying daily. And share it with your children, even if you are just a student yourself. God supplies our needs when we act in faith, believing. Don't just go to church. It isn't wrong to go to church. It can be a beneficial thing, IF you are attending a church that 1) preaches the Word undiluted and truthfully, and teaches it in depth, not with a superficial touch on it, but don't go into it attitude, 2) has the music of the church, not the music of the world, and isn't geared toward entertainment or showcasing people who desire to be “stars” (I have an article about that in my blog archives also) 3) treats prayer as a real necessity and seriously, not as a means of getting people to share things for the sake of gossip, 4) treats children as beings who are capable of learning God's Word, not beings who are incapable of understanding and thus need to be entertained with games, crafts, snacks, and with a simple Bible story thrown in for good measure, 5) follows the rules of good worship according to the Scriptures, not follows the “outpouring of the spirit” chaos which sometimes is NOT the Holy Spirit at all or treats the service as a nightclub venue and 6) has real fellowship, not the kind with cliques or gossip circles. (good luck with that last one.)

If you are doing the disciplines you should be doing for your own growth, and teaching them daily to your children, then if you find a church which does the above, even though it might be on the wrong day of the week as far as being the Sabbath is concerned, by all means, go. Make it priority, but not the FIRST priority. It comes after your personal and your family's relationship with the Lord.

The apostate church today is a part of Babylon. We are called to come out of Babylon. So if it means that to follow the Lord in truth and spirit, you have to come out of the apostate churches and worship in a house church or other type of non-building oriented group, then by all means, do that. But never, ever think that church is a substitute for your daily walk with God in the disciplines, or teaching your children those disciplines on a daily basis. That comes before attending a service in a designated building, which is not Scripturally required by God.